Pride

As Australians, we don't tend to shout from the roof our personal triumphs like other countries do. In my travels, I have found that Americans, Germans, French and the Italians are very good at telling you what they do well. It is not about bragging, it is just having the confidence in their abilities and not being ashamed to promote it. Australian culture is getting better, but there still is that tendency to "cut down the tall poppy" and feel uncomfortable when you read about someone 'talking themselves up'. 


To that end, I have always felt very uncomfortable showing any pride in achievements. I know that's my own problem that I need to get over, so I am starting here - with something very uncharacteristic of me.


I am not a runner. To look at me exercising, you would see a mid thirties, fat chick running (a 'fat runner' as Kim from All Consuming puts it). It isn't pretty or graceful. I don't run, I tend to shuffle my feet. I try to exercise regularly, and I have talked here before about my weight battles - at the end of the day, I like food too much and don't manage the will power very well. 


So it was a surprise to everyone that knows me when I entered the "HBF Run for a Reason". I stupidly decided that the 4km was for wusses and that 14km would be a lot better suited to a novice runner like myself. 


I trained for the 8 weeks beforehand, slowly building up my long run each week and then last Sunday, in time for the event, I managed the 14km! I am so proud of myself that I finally did something I was talking up and not just give in because it was too hard and I wasn't the best at it. 


I certainly didn't break any records and if I am honest, many people walking passed my shuffling body, but I finished it.


I met most of my goals, I didn't require St John Ambulance attendance, I wasn't on the news that night for having a heart attack, I wasn't picked up by the bus that drove at the end of the course that picked up the stragglers that weren't meeting the maximum time limits and if I hadn't had to wait in a toilet queue at the 10 km mark, I would have gone under 2 hours.


I am proud of myself, proud that I finished something I never thought I would and proud that I raised money for Lifeline, a very important charity. 


It was a beautiful day in Perth and I really enjoyed myself. My legs ached for a few days after, but I really think I could get into this running thing.


What is something you are proud of? Shout it loud!

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Linking up today with Jess @ Diary of a SAHM for I Blog on Tuesdays. Head on over and read some really really great posts!

Small Things

I am currently addicted to Where's My Water? a puzzle game app that I have on the iPad at the moment. I am late coming to the party, but have spent my last few nights mastering all the levels.

Simplistically, it is a problem solving game based on the premise of needing to fill Swampy the Alligator's bath with clean water. You dig the dirt away with your finger to allow the water to flow through certain pipes. I had been playing this particular level below for about 20 minutes last night and was bombing out every time. It wasn't until after several minutes of utter frustration that saw steam coming out of my ears, that I actually stepped back to see how I was tackling the level.

For this level, you needed to get the blue (clean), purple (poisonous), and green (sludge) water from the areas on the left out in a certain order. When I looked at what I was doing, I was releasing them in the same order every. single. time. and I hadn't realised. I was repeating the same mistake over and over and over again, without any learning from my error. It took a simple change in the order I was getting the water out for me to solve the level very quickly.

So many things in our lives that frustrate us are from us repeating the same behaviour over and over again. (Many come to mind for me, particularly what I eat). Sometimes It is not until we step back from the situation, breathe and assess that we can see that often a negative outcome that keeps repeating for us can be altered with one simple change to our habits. 

Is there something in your life that you keep repeating the same action over and over again with an unsatisfactory outcome? 

Chantel x

Say Goodbye to Fatty Boombah - Mark II

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Some of you would have read my previous posts about Michelle Bridges' last round of 12 Week Body Transformation. I was posting each Friday, I went in gung ho, did great with exercise and eating for 6 weeks, 6 kilos lost, then had a weeks holiday away, became sick for 2 weeks and then *crickets*. Nothing. I went silent on the whole thing.

As you can imagine, it was because yet again, I had fallen off the wagon. Yet again, I had stopped allowing myself to feel wonderful and healthy and I went back into that horrible cycle of eating crap, no exercise and regretting every bit of my lack of will power. I get angry with myself, and then to make myself feel better, I eat. Then, I get angry at my lack of will power, so I eat. So then the cycle goes round and round and round.

It makes all the things I said here seem meaningless and full of shit. It makes me sound as though I am spineless, weak and can't even make the simple commitment to living healthy for my family. I have had some sadness over the last 10 weeks, nothing major, just little hills to climb, but I have found myself eating for comfort yet again.

This has to stop. If I want to have anymore kids and be able to leave the house on my own steam, and not with the help of the fire brigade, I need to get my shit together. I need to sort my head once and for all and commit to something for the long term. My relationship and my family is one of the few things in my life that I have managed to commit to. Usually, I lose interest, or sabotage things. I need to put my relationship with my body in this category too and commit to it for life. From now.

I know that you have heard it all before, that you don't believe me and that's a very fair attitude going by my history. I just have to prove to myself and to you that I am worth it and I need to do this for me, first and foremost and my family. I feel wonderful when I am fit and healthy - why do I think I don't deserve to feel like that every day? Some brain gremlins I need to address I think. 

I am linking up today with Kate and Natalie's new linky for bloggers that are doing the 12 week body (blogger) transformation. I hope to link up each week or every few weeks. Good luck to those starting Monday. Wish me luck! - things need to change........

Chantel x